Change is good, when you're open to it.

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6:59 PM Tuesday, July 10, 2007

close to a week.

The results for how i fared for this term will be out soon. I hope it reflects how much extra effort i've put in for the term and the common test. Insyallah. I will continue to put in extra extra effort to sustain my grades and work towards getting good A level grades.

Past week has been a pretty terrible week really. Mum wasn't talking to me and all, at first i was really affected by it and yeah, i had to disturb ri one night with me sounding so unglam and all. Blocked Nose! Haha. Apart from the kittens, dad was my source of comfort at home. He kept assuring me to stay strong and don't let it affect my studies. I got better after that few days of total gloom and well, now, this are slowly, very very slowly starting to get better.

It's not that I'm mad at my mum totally or anything for acting so extremely. Come to think of it, she went through worse with my grandma, and me, being the "victim", have to undergo the cycle she went through. Plus, i guess she was shocked by what almost happened cos... she has yet to come to terms with me slowly becoming an adult.

I love my mum, really. But, it's not easy coping with my mum's rules at times. People who know me well know what my mum can do, or how my mum is when she flares up. It was cold war back at home for me. Hmm.. nonetheless, i'm coming to terms with it and well, the cold war is slowly ending. I hope. Dad says that no mum can be so mad at their child for so long. I think if not for my dad, i would have gone insane and i might have been admitted to some hospital. Haha! Naah. I'm more strongheaded than that.

Dad says he understands what i'm going through. I can see that but i don't want to take advantage of my dad's understanding though. So, on my part, i will do something about what almost happened that day. I truly hope ri understands and i'm not gonna give it all up cos of this one small hiccup, like i did when i was in sec 4. I'll explain to my mum soon. Like what my dad said, tell the truth. So i will.

god willing, we'll have many many one days together.

Till then. :)

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