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10:40 PM
Saturday, September 23, 2006
last entry before promos.
Sok puasa..... =) yeay! maknanye raya nak dekat. yeay yeay! lalala...Have you ever seen those old sweet couples, holding hands and talking away as if the world never existed? Well, i have and i think they're a pretty sight. Its a beautiful thing to see. Some people might think its sick but think again. Its nice to know that you have someone to hold on to, especially when you're old. Furthermore, some marriages don't turn all ripe when it grows. Sometimes, it gets sour. Haha. And why am i talking about this so suddenly? Goodness. Ari, you realli influence me. Haha. I can't wait to start puasa-ing. Wanna redeem myself. I love the atmosphere when everyone settles down at home to a good break fast meal. And then we will go solat as a family. Ahh.. This the month for that. Usually, we seldom get to solat as a family cos the parents always come home late for work. Its only me and my sis. Then can terawih. I really really really wanna do good. Its a good thing that promos end before puasa end. Then i can catch up with loads of ngaji which i really do feel guilty of for not doing much. Woots. Why am i suddenly talking about all this? Lols. Ok peeps, i just got a new boyfriend. He's so hawt, i melt when i see him. His indonesian or rather acehnese. He has a super nice voice which puts me in a trance. Haha. I self declare IRWANSYAH as MY BOYFRIEND! wahaha. tak tau malu nyer aku. Okies deh. I`ll go to lala land first. Later sahur cannot wake up. Haha. btw passerby, im not angry at that guy anymore. I don't want my anger to feed on my soul. Its not healthy. Haha. Thanks for the tag aniwae. Would be nice if you at least tell me your name. =) Love, me. 11:27 PM
Thursday, September 21, 2006
you petty mcp.
PUASA NAK DEKAT!!! PROMOS PON NAK DEKAT!! RAYA PON PON PON NAK DEKAT!!wee.. eee.. weeee! After the PW wr's over, i've really had to time to settle down finally and MUG. After school ended today, went to study with lala. The XXY women. Then yas the beast came. AHAH. And my batt just had to go dead. I couldn't sms no more. Sorry "Ari"... That explains my missing replies. wahaha.. Puasa nak dekat nie... YEAY! Bestnyer puasa. Nak cuci iman. haha. Btul btul. No kidding. That's why.. before we all start puasa, i wanna extend out my apologies to all people who see this, those whom i have hurt, through this blog, verbally, through msn, physically.. ANYTHING. To all my grrlfrens, friends, to everyone i know, HOPE this ramadan would be a meaningful one to you all, a month where we learn to abstain from eating, abstain ourselves from being a victim of lust, abstain from speaking about each other behind their backs, abstain from ...... (you fill in here. haha!) I seek all your forgiveness and let's work towards a good fasting month. And to those who are sitting for their prelims, EOY examinations, promos and what-so-ever exams, i wish you luck! Mug mug mug if you must! haha. But rmbr to study SMART. Lols. And get enough rest and all. Anyhoo, i think i`ll be removing this password tingy soon. I'm not afraid of what ppl wanna see.. Who cares anyway. I blog to say what i wanna say. Its my right and my personal space. Haha. Don't you agree so? Yessa! Haha.. Okies... I`ll be on hiatus from Saturday as promos are up next week. Wish me luck people. Before that... I'd like to wish: A HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO..... Bainy... MY KUZZIE! =) Syazwani Jamil ... NURSE KELLYSHA!! =) Christina ... the ex-classmate! =) Till then, im off to lala land. Love, me. 11:08 PM
Saturday, September 16, 2006
i could've asked for more.
if you could just see my heart through my eyes.Promos in a weeks time! Woots. Horror. Today's been a busy busy day fer me. PW meeting in the morning followed by mugging session followed by tuition. Goodness, all the pressure is pressing down hard on me. I have to be strong. I wanna go to a good uni in a year's time! SO. SACRIFICE. PERSEVERE. Haish. What's on my mind now? Maths tutorials, chem extra pracs, econs, GP, phy. Yada yada yada.. the list goes on. I don't think you can even stand it when i keep blaberring on about studies! but yeah. dats how important it is to me. hurhur. even i cant stand it lah! gosh. im officially a nerd, i tell you. ahhhh.. NOV holidays. im so envious of those going for the ouap program. i wanna wanna wanna go overseas please! :) i wanna go new zealand maybe. and i wanna go switz. i wanna migrate. i don't want to stay here. here is stress. here is not nice. ahah! retarded dini. btw, do you know that too little sleep and too much sleep = high risk of getting diabetes? ahah.. RANDOM. but yeah. its true! i saw it somewhere and my friend was like. "gosh, don't tell my im going to die soon?". hahahaha.. iggie iggie. but that fact worries me. does dat mean jc students are more prone to diabetes. baah. i think toooo much. lols. anyhoos. i dreamt about my dream guy yesterday... NOT! haha. i was super tired, i cant rmbr if i had a dream or not. lols. ouhkay ouhkay! im spitting random stuff her. better go watch teevee. many loves for all. mwahs! -i cant be bothered seriously. what is done is done. you don't have to feel guilty no more. i stand to gain nothing from hating you or her. and i stand to gain nothing if im still angry with you or her. we will be friends. and i expect no nothing from you anymore fique. you just go lead your happy life with her. :) what's past is to forgive and forget. i just need my space to breathe for now. cheers. 9:46 PM
Friday, September 15, 2006
random.
Shoot whatever i said then. I can't be bothered anymore!MT was boring... as normal just now so i took out my magic pen and whipped something up. Its random though. BUT its super dark. haha. no idea where that angst and fury came from though. Lols. Amidst The Crowd By deenee*wonder Silence defeaning me, I sit lonely. Coldness i feel in my heart. Noise drowning me, I stand amidst the crowd. Coldness filling me, I stnad lonely. Fear I feel in my heart. Warmness leaving me, I cry amidst the crowd. Fear killing me, I cry lonely. Hatred I feel in my heart. Courage not a part of me I die amidst the crowd. And so! A masterpiece by me. Haha. Enjoy. :) 12:31 AM
Thursday, September 14, 2006
im a metal mouth freak.
addicted to : chemicals react - aly&ajThis week is hectic. Its only wednesday and im half dead, sleep-deprived and all. Im tired from all the bullshite that is happening. I have no idea why i`m putting this password tingy. I guess its just for fun. Its not even foolproof lah. Well, if anyone wanna hack the password, hack lah. I don't care. If you read this and you think its stupid, so be it. But anyhoo, i think its more for me to feel that i am free to type whatever i want cos its my blog and i guess im tired of people asking me everytime what's happening wif me on my blog when its clear enough that im having problems. DUH. I knew it. I know you went back to her. No, im not hurt anymore. Im sick of all that. Believe me.. as much as we try to be, things will never be the same. Our friendship then was close, mutual. But now knowing you, do you think i`ll feel the same about stuffs. You didn't have to hide from me and stuffs. Yeah, i knew that you were back together. But i just didn't know how soon. It was as soon as the leader's camp yah? Hahs. GUYS. Yeah. GUYS. I`ve always been hurt by them. How can i say they're not MCPs? Of course they are. Well, maybe im stereotyping the whole lot just cos of my few personal experiences but hell, i don't think the whole lot is. Just those who keep on breaking hearts thinking they are some big shot but come to think of it, we can live without their existence on earth. But. I'd rather not loom in hatred or grief. Life still goes on. We're still friends. But maybe not as close as we used to be. Never will i think. I wish you and her all the best. Ironically, i used to remember how you were so against her. I took that for real and thought you were nice. But life has its ups and downs. Im getting over it well. Well.. one day, things will be ok. For me, for fatin, for lala. The darlas. :) Woots. Im tired. From all the PW work. Haha. Seriously, i think i wanna flip soon olready. PW is so so so exhausting lah! I don't know how many PW drafts we did olready but we're gonna finish it soon! Its coming on kinda fine. I hope things will stay dat way or improve. I can stand anymore refurbishments anymore! Bahhhs. Rite. Gotta go and grab some winks. For now, i`ll smile and live. Its not the end of life. :) thank you fatin and ila for being there for me! love u grrls. 5:10 PM
Sunday, September 10, 2006
school's starting soon.
School's starting soon. Oh rats!Tests.Tutorials.Extralessons.ExtraExercises.PW.MoreTests.MorePW.Morestress.Morefood. Haha. So much for the short hols. Too bad i didn't think it was much of a hols anyway. More like a torturous week of trips to the school and all. Bad thing is.. i`ve been slacking a lot. So yeah! You get the drift. There's still assignments left untouched, chapters left unrevised. Gosh. Im in deep shite i tell you. Yah. And along with all these worries, comes fats fats fats from all the habitual junking i do. Haha. Ironically, for me, when i get all worked up and stressed, i get FAT cos the only way to calm myself down is through glucose intake. Haha. And more glucose intake without regular exercise means a great increase in my body weight! Argh. Pisses me off. I need Chocolates....... *drools* Im "debab" now. My uncle calls me that.. So does my mum. Ya lah ya lah! Im dini the debab lah. Happy? NOT! Maybe somebody should get me the uZap for my birthday or something. Ahah! Then i can zap zap zap my fats away! Weee... Till then peeps. Mwahs. 6:57 PM
Monday, September 04, 2006
im not myself?
Im glad that my grandma's okay. The doc says that its just symptoms of a heart attack. She's still in the hospital and i pity her cos yesterday i saw her, she didn't look so fine. I hate LONG hospital stays. They tend to be counter-productive at times. Like Hazari said. Haha.I feel super tired these days. I don't really have much energy to joke around and i realise that i`ve been quiet these days. Even at home. I've not been eating as much as i used to. My life has been a roller coaster these days. At times im okay but at times, i just feel weak. And when i feel weak, i go all silent and the least i could do is smile. Nvm bout dat. Maybe its cos i`ve been out a lot, to the hospital almost everyday, and teaching. I'm tired, i admit it and i seriously NEED A BREAK before school reopens. I think my old friends notice the difference in me these days. Ika says im more quiet, as if i've lost my energy and all. I hope it has nothing to do with my health or anything. I don't want to be sick. =) That aside, its nice to have friends who care for you. I love you grrlfrens. Mwahs. And i am glad that we were able to meet recently. *HUGS* I've been pretty ok. Trying the bestest to get my mind straight and study. Im not really affected by all those stuffs anymore. Its important that we make every memory and experience a lesson. Something to teach us so that we won't be so naive in the future anymore. Yeahs. Its all in the mind. Hoho. .jpg) Im sick of being weak. I shall try and walk a lot. Cancel away all those 300 bus rides and cancel away all those lifts. I think i`ll get back in shape. I guess im not active enough these days. That's why i easily feel tired and all. Being in the hospital seriously freaks me out. But come to think of it, the last experience i had wasn't so bad! Cos cos cos... there was this cute guy opposite my bed in the ward and well.. HE WAS CUTE! ahah. And he made my stay less scary. Haha. =P gatalnyer aku! Anyhoos, had school just now. Physics wasn't so bad. BUT econs was a killer. Imagine 3 hours in the LT with econs. I swear i almost fainted. Hoho. Rite rite. Many loves. =) and deepest condolences for the death of Steve Irwin, an environmentalist i admire for his courage and bravery in helping the wildlife. 2:39 AM
Saturday, September 02, 2006
im so sad.
Its 2 am in the morn and i cant sleep. Im tired, yes, but my mind just cant shut down. Im worried. My dear grandma's in hospital. If anything happens to her, i swear i`ll break down.Please god, i hope nothing's wrong with her. ineedahugbadly. and i just wish that people won't quarrel so easily. it tears my heart. `deen. |
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