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12:09 AM
Saturday, July 21, 2007
when all's well, that ends well.
Hellooooo.Lately, things have been getting a little better. Though revision is piling up, things have been resolved. :) Syukur Alhamdullilah. Pressure is amounting in terms of school though. Seems like everyone is headed towards serious mugging and well, wakey wakey DINI! It's time for you to steer your direction towards there too. Lol. But note to self: try not to overwork myself before prelims or not i'll get sick. Which was what i was a few days ago. Had to go on mc for two days. Bad bad. I've got nothing to complain about lately, cos things have been pretty okay. Kittens have been a little too mischievous though lately but owh wells. Whenever they resort to mischief, it's a form of light entertainment for us at home. So... might as well just loosen up and laugh at them! Haha! To ika, hey girl, i didn't quite understand what you wanted from me. I don't have a google email. But if you want the email which i use to log on to blogger, it's the normal hotmail one okay? The one which you have on msn. :) Take care darling! Alrightey. Till then. many many one days! 12:57 AM
Sunday, July 15, 2007
overdone.
Everyone has a limit to their patience. And i must say mine is wearing thin.Some things, you can really endure for a long time, and some things, just get on your last nerve at the speed of light. It gets frustrating when people do stuff for senseless reasons or rather excuses and you end up being the victim of circumstances. No matter how old the person is, it's really just human nature to develop this feeling of resentment in you, one that builds on everyday if that person refuses to crack his or her icy, rocky, stubborness. EGO. Like wth, why the ego? Will ego help you achieve your senseless objective? I thought people always say that when you fight fire with fire, you lose in the end. DUH. And that's what you do. If i join in your battle and become just the way you are, i'm not on the gaining end either. Can't you just realise for once that it's not about who wins who, who gets the final say and all? Can you just be a little more forgiving, or at least learn to? Why be irrational so suddenly? Isn't there others ways of like putting forward you grievances or venting your frustrations? WHY WHY WHY?! I can't believe you would ever succumb to this. I thought better of you really. Whatever. Now, i couldn't care anymore. 7:08 PM
Thursday, July 12, 2007
monthly forecast.
Ramalan buat bulan ini : Malap.Bulan belum terang. Bintang pun pergi menhilang. Langit semakin mendung. Apa boleh buat, nasib badan. Hah. Sampai disini. :) 6:59 PM
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
close to a week.
The results for how i fared for this term will be out soon. I hope it reflects how much extra effort i've put in for the term and the common test. Insyallah. I will continue to put in extra extra effort to sustain my grades and work towards getting good A level grades.Past week has been a pretty terrible week really. Mum wasn't talking to me and all, at first i was really affected by it and yeah, i had to disturb ri one night with me sounding so unglam and all. Blocked Nose! Haha. Apart from the kittens, dad was my source of comfort at home. He kept assuring me to stay strong and don't let it affect my studies. I got better after that few days of total gloom and well, now, this are slowly, very very slowly starting to get better. It's not that I'm mad at my mum totally or anything for acting so extremely. Come to think of it, she went through worse with my grandma, and me, being the "victim", have to undergo the cycle she went through. Plus, i guess she was shocked by what almost happened cos... she has yet to come to terms with me slowly becoming an adult. I love my mum, really. But, it's not easy coping with my mum's rules at times. People who know me well know what my mum can do, or how my mum is when she flares up. It was cold war back at home for me. Hmm.. nonetheless, i'm coming to terms with it and well, the cold war is slowly ending. I hope. Dad says that no mum can be so mad at their child for so long. I think if not for my dad, i would have gone insane and i might have been admitted to some hospital. Haha! Naah. I'm more strongheaded than that. Dad says he understands what i'm going through. I can see that but i don't want to take advantage of my dad's understanding though. So, on my part, i will do something about what almost happened that day. I truly hope ri understands and i'm not gonna give it all up cos of this one small hiccup, like i did when i was in sec 4. I'll explain to my mum soon. Like what my dad said, tell the truth. So i will. god willing, we'll have many many one days together. Till then. :) 2:13 PM
Monday, July 02, 2007
my mum's at it again.
This scenario happened a few years ago and I have come to the conclusion that she is not willing to see me as a grown up girl, someone who is capable of loving others. Sometimes, no matter how much i love her, i wished that i was away from home, far far away where i am able to breathe a little more.As soon as there is a start of something new, you'd always interfere and state your barriers. Now it happens for a second time and i am not willing to give it all up like how i did back then when i was in secondary school. I know my limits. I'm not young and naive anymore, i am old enough to stand on my two feet and think for myself. Can't you for once understand me in this situation? Please? Why the extremity? Do i have to abide to your extremity in order for you to live in peace? Why do i have to undergo the suffering at this point of time again? It's like another cycle repeated only now, i'm not going to give in if you ask me to let go. PISSED. |
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